Had the MRI of my head done last night. I had been warned by a lot of people that I was likely to discover a level of claustrophobia I hadn't been aware of before, but fortunately, I had no problems with it.
They had a little plastic nest for me to rest my head in, and a white cage kind of thing that went over my head, maybe an inch away from my face. Since it was my head they were scanning, I only needed to be slid into the MRI tube to just past my shoulders. I wore headphones playing music from an XM radio channel, and part way through they slid me out to inject some contrast liquid into my arm.
For once my fatigue came in handy. I just did some quick breathing meditation, and then let my mind wander until I drifted in and out of half-sleep, so it seemed to be over in no time.
I expect to hear something about the results this afternoon or Monday. Today is harder than the test itself. I hate the "not knowing". When we were planning and then doing the MRI I was at least doing something. Waiting with all the possible outcomes circling around like birds of prey around a prairie dog colony is much harder for me than laying in an MRI tube with my head in a cage. I can't just drowse through the day or 3 it will take to find out if we've even got answers or not. So my nerves nibble away at me and, along with my fatigue, sap away my ability to fucos.
Friday, June 20, 2008
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